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 Shared Flame review response (FF.net)

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Lady Miya
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Join date: 2012-02-24
Age: 24
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PostSubject: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Tue Mar 13, 2012 8:46 am

Here is the answer to two of the anon reviews on Shared Flame, chapter 35:


Anonymous:

Quote :
I think you should focus on making the conversations sound more
realistic. Your characters' dialogues have a tendency to sound more awkward
rather than formal. I know that the two main characters are both intelligent
and care more about their grammar than most people, but yeah, it gives the
story a sense of reality. For example, instead of "He is..." you could use
"He's" instead? Smile

Here's a really helpful site

(Other than that, I love the story! I'm also going to Stockholm tomorrow WOOO)

Thank you for the tip. Since I'm not a native speaker, I'm not always sure how the most comfortable way of speaking is. I'll see what I can do in the coming chapters. But I'm glad you like the story, regardless and hope you'll have a nice time in Stockholm! Thanks for reading and reviewing.

dee:
Quote :
Good chapter. I do like your writing style and the whole premise of the
story.

As a Hermione fan, I'm pretty tired of Hermione always 'losing' to Voldemort.
I know its not always but the overall impression I get from this story is that
in any situation, Hermione has no power and that she loses out everytime she
and Voldemort have a difference in opinion. And that overall impression pushes
me off from re-reading the whole story when there's a new update [which I
usually do with other stories] since I would get frustrated with Hermione, the
whole story all over again. Its the same with the last update.

I hope this is not offensive to you and I do like your stories.

I'm glad you like my writing style and the premise of the story. I'm sorry you feel that Hermione is losing to Voldemort. She has been weak in the beginning of the story, that is true, however, I have had her evolve. The last thing I wrote in chapter 34 is that she realised she had a lot of power. In this chapter, I tried to show how she uses this power over Voldemort. Not only is she working after her own agenda with Muggleborns and house-elves, but she manipulates Voldemort into thinking this is good for him. So for the last chapter, I can't agree with you that Hermione is always losing to Voldemort.

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Tue Mar 13, 2012 1:44 pm

Another review reply to Shared Flame, chapter 35

Shh
Quote :
"Not tonight... On the First of September, you will arrest him and
Hermione Granger."

Sure, wait until Althea's out of the way. That chick means nothing good...

Thanks for the update!

Haha, yes, they are waiting to get Althea out of the way Wink You'll see why in the next chapter! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Thu Mar 15, 2012 7:31 am

Yet another review reply to chapter 35:

Annon:
Quote :
I have a love/hate relationship with this story. I love it. It's great
and amazing and I can't stop reading it. I hate what is going on with Harry
and the fairys though. I'm almost scared to read next chapter. The suspense
and drama is killing me. That means you are doing a great job. Keep it up Very Happy

Yay, I'm glad I'm doing such a good job! But I do hope the drama and suspense won't kill you. You don't have to worry, though, I won't leave you hanging for good. RL is a bitch at the moment, but I always finish a fic I've started. The draft of the next chapter is already written, so I'll just have to go through it again and send it to my betas. Hope you won't find it too alarming, and thanks for reading and reviewing!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Sat Apr 14, 2012 7:45 am

Review reply to chapter 36:

Angel of Music:
Quote :
No. How could Harry...ugh! I do see his point a little, but,
really. And Alex, what's going to happen to her? I hope Voldie busts out some
epic moves. Razz

Can't wait for more

~Angel

Yes, I think Harry is just very worried about the safety of his family, but he does rush in without thinking quite a bit, doesn't he? As to what will happen to Alex, you'll see in the next chapter! And I'm sorry, but I can't tell you want I have in store for dear old Voldy Cool Thanks for reading and reviewing!


kxj:
Quote :
Oh, I usually love you Harry, but this is completely unforgiveable you
self-righteous ****.

Of course, Hermione didn't explain anything to him, so how was he to know?

Can't wait for the next update!

I usually don't like Harry so much, but yeah, many people are angry at him at the moment. Especially Hermione and Voldemort! But then again, Harry is usually someone to rush in without thinking and since Hermione can't be there to talk him right, things are doomed to become crazy. Thanks for reading and reviewing and I hope you won't have to wait too long for the next chapter!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Mon Apr 23, 2012 5:52 am

Review replies for chapter 36:

annon:
Quote :
Omg these cliff hangers kill my emotions. Love this story.

Yeees, it was a very evil cliffhanger. But those are the most fun when you know you are secure from angry readers in your basement Wink I'm glad you like the story! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

anon:
Quote :
You know that review you got with a single a? yeah my bad, i really
meant to scream at harry! Of all the evil blasphemous things to do! grr...
Doesn't he at least care for the kids at all! That idotic man! I almost
chocked with rage, literally... I was kinda freaked out with myself, but
that's besides the point i reallly hope he dies next chapter! So if you could
do that i'd be extremely pleased oh by the way i love your story one of the
best tomione stories out there!

Ah, yes, it's annoying how FF have started deleting all the screaming in reviews. But I can understand your anger, you share it with many. But I do think he cares for the children, he just cares for the welfare of his own children more than of Voldemort's. In the long run, he thinks he is doing them a favour. The Voldemort he knows isn't the kind to fatherly kind. I'm glad you liked the story regardless, though! We'll see who lives and who dies in the coming chapters. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Tue Apr 24, 2012 5:47 pm

Chapter 1 review reply:

Dead By Dawn:
Quote :
want to know how u can find it apropriate to bring them two
together? its disgusting
.

Firstly: YAY, MY FIRST FLAME! Secondly: If you want appropriate, I suggest you look at Disney where they only show people of the same age and colour being together. I have never and will never claim that my fanfictions are appropriate. If you are disgusted, well, don't read. I assure you that you will not be dead by dawn simply because you don't want to read. Have a nice day!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Sun May 06, 2012 8:44 am

Review reply for chapter 36:

bubbles:
Quote :
Harry deserves a torture session or two! Hes so annoying! But anyway,
great story, im really enjoying it, cant wait for the next chapter!

Yes, Harry is very annoying from time to time, and you are not the only one who wants him punished, many readers have expressed similar views! But I'm glad you like the story and hope you won't have to wait too long for the next chapter! Thanks for reading and reviewing.

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Sun May 13, 2012 9:54 am

Review reply for chapter 37

Angel of Music:

Quote :
YEAHH! Go Hermione and Voldemort! Save your daughter! I really
am curious as to how Harry will handle all of this. Very Happy Amazing as usual.

Angel

Indeed, I think Hermione and Voldemort will do their best to save their daughter as soon as they can. As for how Harry will handle it... well, you'll find out in the coming chapters! Thanks for reading and reviewing Very Happy

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Tue May 15, 2012 5:02 am

Chapter 37

Dy:
Quote :
I feel an extraordinary amount of good will towards the beloved author.

Oh, I'm glad you do Smile It wouldn't surprise me if some other readers want to hurt me for taking so long updating *glances over shoulder*. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Tue May 15, 2012 6:36 pm

Chapter 37

Dija:

Quote :
Miya, this was awesome. I know you said that you feel like it's a slow
update, but I tend to overlook that because I take comfort from the fact thet
you actually care to complete your stories, so thank you for that.

Aw, I'm glad you feel like that! And well, I'm glad you are trusting me as well. I do have completed all my stories so far and I see no reason why Shared Flame would be a difference! I do know how it will end, I just have to write it all Wink

Quote :
I have never been very diligent in leaving reviewes because i felt like that
the usual phrase:"Great chapter, update soon" was more frustrating than it was
helping with the writing, the muse and inspiration. Petty excuses, I know, but
still... I wanted to leave something that is actually a bit more pleasant to
read, aguess.

Well, I understand you. Although it's nice to be appreciated, I don't remember a reviewer who just say "great chapter, update soon". They don't stick with me at all. Not like your review, who have kept me in a good mood all day, so thank you! And yes, you really succeeded in writing a review that is pleasant to read!

Quote :
So onto the story.

What I love about this story, beside Voldemort/Tom *grins slyly* is the unique
plot, and the characters of course. The plot is very interesting and
unpredictable, dynamic and tense, the story consumes you and you have hard
time stopping reading it, it's very addictive Wink. I was never much of a fun of
mixing a wizarding world with the world of fairies, and other simmilar
mythical creatures, so I was a little sceptical in the begining, but now I'm
completely enamored with it.

So many praises, you are making me blush! But please, do continue. I'm a Narcissist in many ways Wink And I'm glad you came around with the mythical creature-piece. I'm also very sceptical about that, since more often than not, they seem to be there just to make a Mary Sue character even more Mary Sue... Oh, well, in this story, I thought it could be an interesting ingredient. Oh, and then I also had some immortal beings in Atlantis... and then there were some snake-tribe-people in The Contract... *cough* Never mind, then... I seem to fill my stories with mythical creatures from other worlds quite a bit. *whistles*

Quote :
I like that you keep your Tom and Hermione ic, of course they develop their
personalities, and dare I say feelings, but you are not straying away too
much, so that's okay. What I have always appreciated about your writing is how
you capture Hermiones character. Weak! Hermione is one of my biggest pet
peeves, especially with this pairing, and as with your other stories you do
not let the situation overpower her, even though she has her moments of
insecurity she is still strong and you showed that trough last couple of
chapters. And even though Hermione is primarly highly logical and rational
person, and undeniably has a couple of Slytherin traits, there was a reason
she was sorted into Gryffindor, and some people accidentally on purpose ignore
that, but you still show her slightly reckless and daring side every once in a
while (nothing like Harrys', of course), and I feel enormous graditude towards
you for that. Oh, and the most important part is that Voldemort is not (I
can't seem to emphasise this enough, some people are just too tickheaded), and
will never be some love sick puppy who would do anything for love and world
peace suddenly, I mean, really?

Yay! I'm glad you find Voldemort and Hermione IC. It's always the hardest when writing fanfiction. Everyone have their own view of the character and so it will always be a little OC from the books, but I'm happy that some people seem to share my view of Hermione and Voldemort enough for them to be considered IC. I do agree that most people seem to forget that Hermione was placed in Gryffindor for a reason. I don't know if I'd call her reckless (but that's probably because I picture Harry to be image of recklessness), but she is impulsive. Like when she hits Draco Malfoy in the third book, or kisses Ron in the final battle. So I've tried to keep her a bit impulsive in SF as well, and I guess that could be viewed as reckless to some extent.

As to Hermione being weak, that is something I got some complains about earlier in the story, and rightly so. But I'm glad you didn't let that discourager! I never planned for her to stay weak, because she is such a strong woman. But I just figured with the war, and having a baby and then not getting any friends down in Australia, she would be weaker. Oh well. I'm glad that period is over now. It was hard to write at times.

Laughs about the Voldemort-part! Indeed, he is no love-sick puppy. I don't know how many reviews I get about how the reader is certain that Voldemort loves Hermione. I'm not sure if they are serious enough or if they just mistake Voldemort's obsession and possessiveness over Hermione for love. Oh, well. They are entitled to their own interpretation. You can never control what people think when they read what you have written. There are so many things that are left unsaid after all. But I'll never intentionally write Voldemort as if he was loving Hermione. He just don't do love!

Quote :
Another thing I am grateful for. I also like the way you write your OC characters, mainly Althea and Alexandra, because
they became part of the story and it feels right, you breathed life in them,
and you have captured that childlike innocence and naivety that are the most
important traites in little children despite their intellect and skills, and
that's mighty funny and amusing to read.

Oh, I'm glad you think so! I'm always nervous when writing OC and I've never written children before. I don't really understand children. I do remember the things I cared about when I was a child, but, meh... children are weird. So I'm glad you think I'm doing a good job!

Quote :
Eh, the spell to find the missing
people simply brilliant. And Harry, that's exactly something Harry would do,
it looks like that his „hero complex“ and his recklessness and lack of
cunning are going to backfire on him (go Voldy XD), and even though I harbor a
great dislike for him at the moment, I also understand him and his reasoning.
But still, do think before you act Harry *smirks in true Draco Malfoy
fashion*.

Haha, you are probably one of the few who understands Harry's reasoning. He did make a mistake it it backfired, but he did only have his friends' and family's best interest at heart. However, I think it's safe to say that he is going to pay for what he did!

Quote :
Loved everything and am looking forward to reading more chapters (hopefully in
the near future, but no pressure though) and am intrigued to see in which
direction you are planning to take this story.

Thanks for posting Very Happy

Dija

I'm so happy you enjoyed the story so much! I do hope you won't have to wait too long for the next chapter. I have begun writing on it, but it isn't very far, and I've just started with my home-exam, so will not get a lot of time to write on it in the next week or so. But oh, well, hope you'll like it once I got it written!

Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Miya

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Sat Jun 23, 2012 7:20 pm

Chapter 25

Anon:

Quote :
Wheres the next chapter? We all want to know what happens next!

Well, since your review is from chapter 25, you do have 12 more chapters after that Wink But I assume you mean chapter 38. Don't fear, it's on my computer, as well as those of my betas. Soon, you'll find out what happens in it as well!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Sun Jun 24, 2012 5:59 pm

Chapter 39

Annie 6/24/12:
Quote :
"Why, broken into Gringotts, of course." !Very Happy I can't wait for the next chapter. This one was perfect.* Thanks for updating;)

You are most welcome! I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter so much! I think you'll see quite a bit of action in the next chapter, so hope you'll enjoy that as well. Thanks for reading and reviewing!

Dija 6/24/12

Quote :
Brilliant chapter as always, and as always leaves me in suspense wanting for more. Argh, but that's my own fault for reading the stories that are not completed, but with yours I can't complain much. Wink

Indeed. I rarely began reading a fic before it's completed, but I'm glad there are so many people who aren't like me. If there were, I wouldn't get any reviews, and that would be boring. But I'm glad you aren't regretting the decision too much. I do promise that I'll always finish my fics!

Quote :
Oh, and I absolutely loved how you have described Voldemort's thoughts about breaking free, hmmm so devious, cunning and manipulating, but what else could we expect from our favourite villain?

And Hermione again letting her impulsive side to take over and coursing Voldie with cruciatus, I must confess I really enyojed that scene *whispers quietly while trying to find a safe place to hide*, cause the tension was so high, almost palpable, and you could tell she wasn't being in her rational state of mind, rather then she found her inner Gryffindor, or better yet her inner Harry *sniggers evilly*, and you could feel the frustration from the last few chapters leeking out with that Unforgivable. Good to see she is not only the good obedient little trophy wife, oh, and she had to mean it to hurt and last so much, didn't she? Says while mentally giving high five to Hermione and chearing her on. Ok, scratch that, I haven't just written that *says while watching at the Molly Weasly's twin clock that is pointing at mortal peril and madly trying to find that safe place to his Lordship's wrath*.

Yes, it was about time Hermione hit back. Mind, she has done so before, but this time, I just had to have her do something out of the ordinary. She was too angry. (Which is why I'm now writing this from my very secret location... oh no, what was that? scared to death).
But I'm glad you could see that it have been built up for a while now. There is always a risk when posting chapters so far apart that readers will forget the underlying tensions that goes through several chapters... but oh, well. If tv-series makers can do it, then so can I!

Quote :
Ah, and Potter *spits out in true Draco Malfoy fashion*, you really never learn? Slytherins do not fight fair. Well, I have always liked Harry as a character, sure his self-righteous side and hero complex were always a bit irritating, but your Harry (mainly in this story) while is not ooc displays these emotions in his true and the most Harry-esque fashion that I simply love to hate him. No, wait hate is too big of a word, ok dislike it is then.

Yes, for some reason, Harry's annoying sides came through more in this story than my earlier (then again, I don't have a lot of Harry in those... but anyway). I sort of channelised Harry in book five while writing this. There, no one believed him either and he was behaving very, very annoyingly about it. I really disliked him in that book... and that sort of lived on afterwards for a while. I'm not very fond of writing Harry.... oh, well.

Quote :
And Alex, spending all of her time in library hoping to discover a way to find her missing sister, that's so cute and adorable, and when you come to think about it is something most of the children would do in the simmilar situation.

Oh, yes, I felt like Alex was more a problem-solver than someone who just give wallow in sorrow when something bad happened. Both her parents are problem-solvers after all. I've no idea if children normally do that, though, but if you say so, than I'm happy I at least keep her IC when it comes to children. Sometimes it's hard to write children as children, so you kind of make them into adults in a child's body. But so far, I've had no complains, so I guess I'm doing a good enough job. I hope...

Quote :

That scene with the minister, Harry and others had me laughing at their naivety and stupidity (but then again they never really showed any inelligence or wisdom while making dicesions) and thinking: "Well played, Voldemort, well played indeed". Check for him, definitely.

Yes, Voldemort is definitely patting himself on the shoulder for a job well done!

Quote :
Merlin's library, you say? And in Gringotts no less. That should be interesting to say the least, can't wait to read more about it.

I'm actually typing up those scenes right now, so I hope you won't have to wait as long as last time for the new chapter. Summer holiday ftw!

Quote :
I am absolutely delighted that you have managed to find the time to write this chapter and to share it with us. I really feel some strange excitement every time I see you' ve uptdated and feel like doing the happy dance.

Thank you again, and I must tell you that it really is a pleasure reading everything you write, you have incredible ideas, and what fascinates me even more is that you never fail to do them justice when writing and translateing them to the written word. Your stories equals my cure for boredom and are a great pastime.

Your always

Dija

devoted reader, and from recently even a reviewer Very Happy

Well, you are most welcome. I really enjoy writing this, even though I sometimes should be doing other things like... eh... schoolwork and what not. But I just have to write it out, or I'd go mad. But I'm so happy that other people enjoy what I make up as well. And knowing that other people do enjoy it is also an extra carrot for when you get stuck in writing. I don't just give up thinking "who cares", because I know other people do... so I keep writing, and finish the fic, even though other plot-bunnies are reproducing like... well, bunnies. Soooooooo, thank you, I guess it's what I want to say. And I'm very happy that you have begun reviewing as well as reading. It really brings a smile to my face to read them!

Your humble author,

Miya

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Mon Jun 25, 2012 1:15 pm

Chapter 39

Angel of Music:
Quote :
This is sooooo brilliant. I absolutely love every single word.
I love the way you capture their personalities, and how real Hermione's anger
feels. I feel like she has changed a lot since meeting Voldemort. And Alex is
adorable. I loved Voldemort's snicker at 'Voldydork' that was brilliant.

I cannot wait for more

3 Angel

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it so much. Well, I thought I had to make Hermione's anger feel real, so I'm glad that came through. She has changed since meeting Voldemort, and so has he Smile
Yees, I think I'll have to have Alexandra call him Voldydorks again. It was too much fun.
Thanks for reading and reviewing! I do hope you won't have to wait too long for the next chapter!

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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Mon Jul 16, 2012 3:56 pm

Review replies for chapter 39:

?
Quote :
Great chapter. I really loved what happened down at Merlins tomb and I can't
wait to see how they will use the information Hermione got from there to help
Althea. Keep up the excellent work Smile

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it. It was really about time to have some adventure going on, and Merlin's tomb seemed like the excellent place for it! And I hope Hermione will have found some help down there to. Merlin said so, but can you really trust Slytherins? Wink Anyway, thanks for reading and reviewing!

?
Quote :
Crappy guards, don't they know who they were shooting at? Don't mess with
Hermione Grangers man, you'll die. Merlin is very smart if he doesn't let
Voldemort in, I hope all the information that Hermione got is useful, or else
it'll be a bum trip for nothing. I loved this chapter and can't wait to see
what's coming in the future.

I'm afraid the guards were unaware of who they were shooting at. Of course, they all paid with their life so... maybe they figured out just before they died? Naaah, don't think so. They didn't look too bright to me. And you wouldn't dare mess with either Hermione's man or Voldemort's woman, I think!

Yep, Merlin was probably very clever not to let Voldemort in. I don't think he would have paid as much respect to Merlin's wishes of not taking anything else as Hermione did. So he got to take a bath instead! But he will at least get to look at what she brought out now... if he is feeling alright. Poor dear. That was quite some curse... *Miya hides*. Glad you liked the chapter so much and I hope you won't have to wait too long for the next one! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

?
Quote :
omg, she used avada! I wonder what he'll think of that... great chapter, I
love how intriguing you made Merlin's resting place - not too much detail, but
just enough, it was perfect. Smile

Favorite line from this chapter: "Your last plan was thwarted by three
teenagers; I think you need all the help you can get."
Haha! I definitely laughed at that one; nice work!

Yes, Hermione used the Avada... again Wink I'm afraid Voldemort have had quite a bit of bad influence on her! But I imagine that he will be quite proud, meheheh. Oh, I'm bad at the details on environment, but I'm glad you felt like Merlin's tomb had just enough. It's so hard to get it just right...

Hahahaha, yes, there are many things in this chapter which would have me hiding from the Dark Lord... reminding him of his failures is definitely one of them Wink So I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for reading and reviewing!


Dy:
Quote :
As always, it's charming. Today was a more robust episode. Less slice of
life. More dragons. Anyways, nothing wrong with it. Good show. Carry on.

Oh, I'm glad you think so. It was definitely more action it in. It's harder to write, though, than the slice of life-scenes, but it's more something you remember afterwards. And sometimes you need it in the story, so it will keep being interesting! Oh, carrying on right away Wink Thanks for reading and reviewing!

LAura:
Quote :
Wait what about his wand?

Voldemort summoned his wand back from the water. Hermione fought with that Smile He will get it back in the next chapter!



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PostSubject: Re: Shared Flame review response (FF.net)   Mon Jul 16, 2012 4:53 pm

Chapter 38

Zeratul217:
Quote :
Good work this story's plot is fantastic it's characters are well
developed all in all fantastic story looking forward to gringottd break in Very Happy

Oh, I'm glad you are liking the plot and characters so much Smile I like it too, so I'm always happy others do it! And I hope you are enjoying the new chapter which contains the break in at Gringotts! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

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